Wintery Wonderland and Dangerous Caulk Gun Dave

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Hi again from the balmy state of Nebraska.  A lot has happened since we last chatted.  So kick back relax and enjoy the update. 

One of my fellow bloggers coined the phrase “the weather has really been bipolar this spring” and I totally agree with her assessment.  In the last post I talked about the week of nice weather and then right after posting that blog post I awoke to the following scene.  It definitely was a Courier and Ive’s kind of a scene.

I always enjoy these late spring wet sloppy snows because first I know they aren’t going to last long and second it’s nature’s way of giving that high nitrogen shot to get things growing in the spring.  March truly is a volatile month in Nebraska.  Here’s another picture of the street at the bottom of my street.  The pictures really don’t do justice to how gorgeous it was.  It lasted most of the day but by the next morning is was starting to melt and soak into the ground.  That’s another reason I like these last spring snows.  The moisture soaks into the unfrozen ground instead of running down the street into the storm drains.

A few days later the snow was gone and this little Crocus celebrated spring by blooming her heart out.  I have a whole row of these out by the street along the curb.  Jerry Baker a well know author and gardener says that Crocus can be planted in the lawn and by the first cutting they are finished blooming and it won’t hurt to mow them down.  This is the second year for these Crocuses to come up and bloom so I guess he was right on this one.  More about Jerry later.

This next part may be a little shocking but I suppose you are used to that from me. I journeyed to a fantasy land called Las Vegas to visit with family and friends.  As you know I can’t really go anywhere without getting caught up in a project or two.  This time was no different.  My sister decided to completely gut and remodel her second bathroom.  Everything came out and a new giant shower only was installed along with new cabinets and toilet.  Steve, my Sister’s brother-in-law, was the ramrod and straw boss of the motley rag tag crew that consisted of his son Chis, me, and himself.  We worked several days on the project and by the time I came back home it was well on the way to being completed.

You think the picture is shocking wait until to read the first poem ever written by me.  Now in high school I detested poetry but a fellow blogger right here on Grit encouraged me to read poetry by a Nebraska poet and I found it was nothing like the stuff I had encountered in high school.  So let me know what you think.

 If you really need to caulk
And don’t want a talk
Who you gona call?
Dangerous caulk gun Dave!

If you really need to saw
And don’t want to jaw
Who you gona call?
Lightning skill saw Steve!

Now ya all know
Who ya gona call,
And ya really should know
That I ain’t a poet

There’s a moral to the story,
And it ain’t about glory,
It’s more about helpin’
And less about gettin’.

OK, lets move on to the next thing. I promised to tell you more about Jerry Baker the well known author and gardener.  Maybe some of you have seen him on Public Network TV.  Lets just say that his lawn and garden care methods are …. well a little unorthodox.  I thought I would put the methods to the test and see if they are all that Jerry says they can be.  I am going to use his lawn care methods on the front yard for this year and just see if my lawn is the envy of the neighborhood.  Eeeeh well it might take a couple years to bring it up to the envy of the neighborhood.  Anyway here we go on the supplies to get ‘er done.

Just in case you can’t see the all the items here’s a list.  Starting in the back row from left to right there’ bone meal, liquid fertilizer, Epsom Salts, Instant tea, baby shampoo, dish soap, mouth wash, ammonia, and a six pack of beer.  Yeah I know what your thinking about the beer but it really is for the lawn.  By the end of the season I’ll have an alcoholic front lawn.  I’ll probably have to send it to rehab next year.  The yeast in the beer is supposed to be good for the bacteria in the ground. …. Yeeeaaah OK.  OK, in the front row starting on the left is chewing tobacco, slow release lawn fertilizer, lawn line, and gypsum.  The first of the concoctions which Jerry calls tonics have been spread on the lawn.  Jerry has a book called Green Grass Magic that contains all his home formula tonics for the grass.  One is a mix of bone meal, Epsom salts, lawn lime, and gypsum and was applied with a lawn fertilizer spreader.  This was followed up by mixing up a liquid mixture in a hose end sprayer with baby shampoo, instant tea, regular cola, and ammonia.  Within a week a half dose of regular fertilizer/Epsom salts mixture will need to be spread on the lawn followed by a hose end spray of beer and dish soap.  A week later the other half of the fertilizer/Epsom salt mixture will be spread on the lawn.  It all sounds really complicated and it took me the better part of a day to figure out all the different tonics and when to apply them.

Here’s the beginning of the process.  I just gave it a good raking to get the winter lawn debris off the yard before I started.  After the initial two applications, it’s been too windy to put down the next two applications but I still have a couple days before the week is up.  I’m trying to do it as close to what the book says as I can.

Ok, that’s it for this time.  I’ll give you an update on the winter food storage area next time.  It’s coming along slowly.  I guess if I staid home more it would get finished faster wouldn’t it?  I hope you enjoyed the ramblings from Old Nebraska Dave’s Urban homestead.

Have a terrific spring preparation and planting time.  See ya next time and leave a comment about what’s happening with your projects.