I think I’m going to start placing bets on Dunkay and the goats. Daily, I let the barnyard clan out in the main yard to graze and, hopefully, eat every last leftover maple leaf rotting on the ground. Unfortunately, the donkey and goats also know where the duck pen is with yummy quacker food inside. As soon as I open the gate, the three of them RACE to the corner of the yard known as Duckieland. It is almost shameful at times as manners are set aside and they push each other out of the way to get there first!
Once in awhile, I literally slap my hand to my forehead remembering that I forgot to tie the gate so they can’t get in to Duckieland. Yes, that’s right, tie it with rope. They are smarter than the average bear and know how to open every gate and latch that man has created! Which means, I have to run behind them trying to get to the pen before they do! A donkey, two goats and a crazy farmer lady running neck and neck towards the back yard is a sight to see and probably worthy of an automatic yard cam at some point.
I can just hear the announcer giving odds and commencing the race with “Ladies and gentlemen, at 2 to 1 is Dunkay, Crazy Lady at 5 to 2, Mountain Goat at 20 to 1 and distant long shot Pudge Boy at 70 to 1 …”
“Racers have come through the farm gate and they’re off! Here comes Crazy Lady on the gravel stretch with Mountain Goat a nose behind, Dunk the donk is coming up fast as Pudge Boy goat is bringing up the rear!”
“At the maple bend, it’s Dunk the donk passing Crazy Lady, Mountain Goat and Pudge Boy collide and … Mountain Goat is off the track in a swirl of dust and Pudge Boy is falling three tail lengths behind!”
“Here they come down the final turn to the finish pine.”
“Dunk and Crazy are nose to nose, Dunk pushes Crazy causing a near fall.”
“WAIT! Mountain is mounting a charge aaaannnd, yes, takes the lead after an amazing come back!!!”
“Hold all bets! What’s this? Somehow, folks, Pudge Boy is already inside the Victory pen and eating the duck food prize. Unbelievable, ladies and gentlemen!! Pudge Boy comes out of nowhere against all odds for the win!”
Dunk, Crazy and Mountain stand there in disbelief as Pudge accepts his prize and the white quaker duck prominently stands close like the end of race pretty lady presenter. To the victor go the spoils! What a race!